Survival tip: It’s raining babies

The infamous show about teens dealing with motherhood.
The infamous show about teens dealing with motherhood. (SOURCE:http://tippnews.com)

In a world where ABSTINENCE is shoved down our throats, it isn’t surprising that having babies is all the rage.

Making babies is so passé. No one cares about the process. It’s all about the finished product: a mini human that can be dressed up, told what to do, and carried around like a chihuahua in a bag.

SERIOUSLY.

MTV does a great job glorifying teen pregnancy. It makes a one-year-old hotter than a new Alexander Mcqueen handbag.Shows like “Sixteen and Pregnant” and “Teen Moms” are cult classics among high schools, and sadly, yours truly.

I don’t know what it is about the show. It could be that I’m as empathetic as can be (dog movies are my weakness) and feel sad for these young moms. It’s like watching the Lifetime Network — minus the murders, evil step parents, Craigslist themed movies, and crazy women (actually, these moms are pretty coo coo for cocoa puffs.)

Some say it’s like watching a car crash. You see it happening in front of you, turn to the side as you roll aside it, and look in your review, shrugging as you pass.We usually know what is going to happen in each episode, since every show goes my the strict formula.

BABY POTION NUMBER 9:

1.The girl has sex with someone of equal status (cheerleader and football player).

2. The girl gets pregnant (WHAT A SHOCKER). The show titles definitely ruin the suspense.

3.The boyfriend is unsupportive (he takes forever to get a job, doesn’t want to let go of high school dreams, or isn’t involved with the pregnancy at all.)

4. The parents don’t approve (either they don’t like the boyfriend or just the whole situation).

5.The parents are overbearing. They feel like they need to take over since their daughter is an unfit parent. (Well, what got them into this situation?)

6. NO MONEY, ALL PROBLEMS: Most of the teen couples are still in school, don’t have jobs, and have no way to support another being.

7. Rockstar lifestyle might not make it: the teens can no longer juggle their nightlife with their new found responsibility.

Throughout my life, I hear, “lead by example”. In this case, teens are taking this quote to heart.

This is the mental dialogue they have:

WARNING:DRAMATIZATION-

“So you are telling me that if I hold a baby for ONLY nine months,I can get on a TV show and get paid for just having a baby? AWESOME!”

Of course, all teens don’t think like this (cross your fingers), but I feel like teens find it more acceptable to have a baby today.

BEFORE:

Kids were sent away. You would wonder where Stacy went for a year, and notice that she did put on a little weight.

Sex was taboo.

Babies were a big noo noo.

NOW:

Baby = TV show

THIS HAS TO STOP.

It’s fun watching these shows knowing that you would never find yourself in those shoes.

Yet, I have seen firsthand how lives change with child birth.

Another thing that bothers me about these teen moms is that they SWEAR that their baby is the CUTEST LITTLE THING IN THE WORLD… Wow.

That statement is debatable when your baby has a head the size of a watermelon.