College is a strange time for many people. Most college students are legal adults, yet a full-time commitment to school leaves them with limited time for adult responsibilities. Family support comes in handy here, not just financially but also for emotional well-being. Family members can assist a stressed student by helping out with bills, taking care of housework, and preparing meals. When a student is feeling overwhelmed by the mental demands of college, family members can lend a listening ear and provide comfort. However, this is not an option for some students.
While exact numbers vary between surveys and studies, there are a significant number of college students who are estranged from their families. Students who are estranged have no contact or support from their families. Estrangement can occur for a variety of reasons, like differing belief systems, disagreements over academic choices, or abuse within the family. While the image of the lone college student pulling themselves up by their bootstraps might evoke courage, estrangement can be a lonely and grueling existence.
One of the first barriers to higher education faced by estranged students is the cost of college. While financial contributions from parents are not expected, FAFSA applications do require parental information to receive federal student aid. For special circumstance consideration, a student must go through the college’s financial aid office to get appropriate documentation approved. This documentation can vary from institution to institution and often has to be re-submitted every year.
Another hurdle for estranged students is self-support. For students who are still in touch with their families, basic needs like housing, food, clothing, and transportation come without question. However, for estranged students, the things that we may take for granted have to be consciously taken into consideration on a regular basis. It is hard to focus in class when you also have to worry about affording your next meal and whether you will have stable housing throughout the school year.
Possibly, the biggest issue that estranged students contend with is the overarching sense of loneliness that accompanies their college experience. There is often no one to cheer you on, offer praise for a job well done, provide guidance when it comes to the confusing American college education system, or just be there to offer advice in a difficult situation. Estranged students can feel othered from their peers because having to juggle classes and adult responsibilities leaves you feeling eons older than the average college student. Perhaps the most difficult part is during the holidays when everyone returns home to their family, but you have no one to celebrate with.
Even though graduation might feel impossible when you’re estranged, I hope that the estranged students at Bellevue College will keep at it. As an estranged student myself, it’s hard to keep going when faced with numerous challenges, but I find hope in the fact that a college degree will allow me sustained freedom.
