Survival Tips: New Year, New Love

This is what happens when you don't get a new years kiss (SOURCE:
This is what happens when you don't get a new years kiss (SOURCE:

Forget the mistletoe. It’s time for the disco ball drop.

As the ball drops, the streamers fly, and the sequins shimmer many will embark on a conquest to find new love.

See this as a clean start. Take your love life and shake it like an Etch-A-Sketch.

It’s time to forget about the heart breaks, the bad blind dates, and the numerous nights that ended with you on your couch eating a gallon of ice cream while watching Bridget Jones.

Tis the season to catch up on your love game. Don’t go into the new year with a self-defeatist mentality.

Reinvent yourself.

How to approach the new year:

1. Start the year with a nouveau you: a new body (mostly booty thanks to the shape ups that your Grandma gave you).

2. A new wardrobe: Pajama jeans courtesy your beloved friends.

3. New year lust: A new significant other (well, mostly just a night fling that has the potential to last).

We all want to have a new year kiss.

Legend says the kiss foresees who will be our 2011 romance.

Perhaps you seek a Ryan Reynolds or a Scarlett Johannson (sexy and now single), but will have to settle for a person with a Justin Bieber voice and the fist pump action of a jersey shore scrub (works for either gender).

There is an allure to a stranger’s kiss, but I wouldn’t advise it.

They will probably give you more than you bargain:

1. You had an unforgettable night with someone and completely lost contact with him/her, but have no worries in a month’s time you will be showing signs of the kissing disease.

You have mono.

2. You don’t want the night to end. You had the time of your life, but will probably not see the person again. A week passes and you can still feel their kiss, and it hurts.

You have type 2 herpes.

Rules to live by (mostly learned through movies):

1: Know your limit:

Bringing in the new year means partying hard, but you don’t want to blackout before the lights go out.

You don’t want to meet “the best person you’ve ever seen in your life” and realize the next day that she/he’s jobless, toothless, and homeless.

2: Expect the unexpected:

Just because you kiss someone at midnight doesn’t mean you will end up with them or should end up with them. They kiss you at midnight and move on to your best friend at 12:01.

Just because you are kissing someone doesn’t mean they are a kissing champ.

I doubt you want to kiss some with the fish out of water technique for a whole year.

I say don’t get hung up on new year rituals. Have fun. Spark up a conversation with a stranger.

Become the person you always wanted to be (within reason of course). Regardless of what you do enjoy the new year, new love, new you.